Dear Reader,For whatever reason, it seemed as though the majority of Rifthold enjoyed the last blog posted by Halos Kyong. I would like to forewarn you that he yet again does not make any sense, nor should you abide by his recommendations or trust his stories to be true. Enjoy at your own risk.
~ Tarron Nai, Right Hand of the King
This journal has certainly seen better days, at least since last time I wrote in it, but welcome back! It’s time for another edition of my absolutely fantastic advice that you really ought to follow if you want to be cool, rich, powerful, hot, and loved, just like myself, Halos Han Kyong. I got that annoying itch in my brain yet again and have created another masterpiece just for you all here in Erilea. So without further ado, let’s just get right into it!
Plucking Plants
First and foremost I would like to bring up the idea of gardening. Yes gardening, you heard me right. The very dirty, sometimes smelly, and always tedious hobby that I certainly have never found myself doing. It’s why I have elected to ban it from Rifthold! So yes, the act of gardening, shaping plants, or planting anything of the sort is simply not allowed anymore. But you may ask yourself, What type of Authority does this man have? All of it. That’s your answer.
Despicable Pop-Up Books
For this next one I wanted to dive a bit deeper into my own lack of childhood, specifically the topic of Pop-Up books. Genuinely, if someone can describe to me their purpose, I’m all ears. But anyways, because of how difficult they are for me to understand, I’m thinking of only letting those pre-approved authors write them. The list of authors? Well currently it only contains Tarron Nai (former Scholar Master), Viola Bliss (Current Scholar Master), and Caelestis Silvaire (Scholar). However if you yourself wish to be added to this list, feel free to apply. I probably won’t accept you though unless you have the gods-given definition of what a Pop-Up book is.
Long Hair in the back, shot tempered in the front
Finally, we have reached the most pressing issue to speak about for this day. I have been recently informed by a “friend” of mine that the type of hairstyle I have is technically a Mullet. I do not like this word one bit, so of course I didn't do what any reasonable fae male of my stature would do and punched him straight in the face. Nevertheless though, he was right. And the more I think about it, the more I realize that maybe my hairstyle is the peak of fashion at the moment. I am, after all, the most attractive of all of my siblings, so that goes to show just how well I can wear such a questionable hairstyle. Still, if someone ever tells me offhand that I have “a Mullet” don’t expect to wake up in your bed the next day.
So , I have chosen to leave you today, for a second time, with this fantastic advice. You have been threatened, warned, and most importantly, banned from practicing the art of gardening. Heed me well, Citizens.
Interested in writing blogs for us? Take a look at our Application, which can be found at the Associations Page at the Stone Castle in Rifthold. If you have any questions, feel free to send a fox to Ariellanna Oriland.